Something About Relationship

A friend of mine is going go to get a divorce with his wife today and he asked me something about how to go through the process.

人和人之間的關係真的是很奇妙的… 兩個人相約由同一個地方出發，卻往往不能一同走到終點。 When I first got married, I wanted to last with him. I believed that everything could be changed, my ex would have never done the things that he did to me. 2 years after we got divorced, I had a chance to tell him how I thought about our relationship. I said, "I don't blame you or hate you. You just didn't know how to treat a woman you've loved once." But I still told him that I wanted an apology, and he did. I knew he didn't really feel like he did wrong, but that was all I needed. "I'm sorry for what I did to you." from his mouth, that was enough.

About my friend, he and his wife live and work in two different countries. He is taking their two kids while his wife is running part of their business in China. When I heard that the first time, I felt interesting. I thought men are supposed to be the one who work their asses out for the family out side, not the wives; but he told me he liked it this way. Then, when we met, he told me that he found his wife was having an affair with someone and he has known for awhile. I asked him what he wanted to do. He just simply replied, "Nothing. We have no feeling on each other anymore."

After getting divorced, I've become a totally different woman. I don't trust men easily. I don't believe in "love", I don't even think I will get married again, at least that is what I think now. But, I met a guy who I am seeing now. He is a very decent man who really cares about me, but he didn't know that I am divorced and have a daughter when we first dated. I lied to him. I was afraid if I told him, he wouldn't have treated me the same way. After a year of dating, I still told him the truth. I didn't expect that he would have accepted the truth, but he did. However, things have changed.

He is still the decent man I like, but every time when I talk about my daughter with him, he has no response. I know it's hard for a man to take the truth that his girlfriend was married once and has a daughter. I give him time, I avoid to call my daughter by her Chinese name because it mentions her last name of her father. I don't even call my daughter "daughter" but instead of calling her by her English name. I don't know if he can really feel and understand why I am doing this. I just hope there may be one day, he will tell me that he wants to talk about it. Just don't know when he will be prepared; and I am not sure how long I can wait.

There is something really touching I saw from the movie "Guess Who." When the main actor was talking about his girlfriend with the girl's father. He said, "She is the other half I am not." There is someone said about the same thing to me before. I was very touched, but didn't think we could work out. I will always remember what he said,"You are my better half."